Tuesday, June 2, 2009

I'll never get old LIKE THAT!!!


I’ll never get old LIKE THAT!!!!

Today is the day I can officially go online and sign up for my Social Security Retirement Benefits. In three months I will be 62.

Good Lord how did this happen?? As I write this I am looking through little reading glasses and hold on ~ you aren’t going believe this ~ they are hung around my neck on one of those strings old ladies and bookkeepers wear!! No offense to bookkeepers but I never intended to be an old lady. I can so clearly remember when I was a teenager; looking at my parents who were what 45??? And thinking I’ll never get old like that! I won’t ever let myself go and have a wide waist, wrinkles, and for sure no turkey neck hangin’ down. I’ll always have a bounce to my step, stamina, strength, and grace.

What was I thinking? What did I think was going to happen? I should have been suspicious when my first invitation to join AARP came on my 50th birthday.. But I didn’t heed the warning. I was walking straight into old womanhood. It was so sly I never saw it coming. Oh sure the skin under my upper arms had started to wave, even when I wasn’t. The hair that had been intentionally blonde had been allowed to become it’s natural white. It was no longer “she’s the blonde over there” it had become “she’s the lady over there with the gray hair”.

Somehow physical yard work, that had once been easily mastered, was now a chore. A chore that at times, was more than I could sustain and complete.

Words began eluding me. I’d try and explain a thought and lose the precise language I wanted to use. “It sounds like, it’s like, oh you know.” What the heck? Part of my brain, along with many body parts was already headed towards the road to retirement.

I have noticed “old people” behavior slipping into my life. Things like “I don’t like to drive at night” and “is there a smaller portion of this meal?” Yep me and the little kiddies eat on the lighter side now. Oh this is a good one, I start questioning “do I really need to go to the restroom? Or is it because I’m old and I think I need to??” You Seniors get my drift.

I don’t hear quite as well , climb stairs as quickly, and I sure as heck don’t see as well. NO! NO! NO!
Talk about shock and awe. I still can’t believe I am the same age as my grandparents when I was growing up. Gosh they were old. I have used up way more time than I have left. And by the way what did I do with what I used up?? It’s like I was given a bag of golden days when I got here and now it’s ¾ gone. Not only that, I can’t tell you what I spent most of those golden days on, amazing… grace.
My friend Cheryl sent me an article today and in it was a quote, lyrics actually, by Willie Nelson. They seem to sum up my feelings right now so I’d like to share these words of wisdom by Zen Master Willie.
Nothin’ I Can Do About It Now.
I could cry for the time I’ve wasted
But that’s a waste of time and tears,
And I know just what I’d change
If I went back in time somehow
But there’s nothing I can do about it now.



4 comments:

  1. You nailed it, Honey. Danged if I can figure out who that wrinkled broad is who peers at me from the mirror. also can't figure out where I left my coffee.......Cheryl

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm thinking if all the fun stuff is over what am I doin' still going to work, eating right, trying to get enough exercise?? Why am I not eating ice cream for breakfast, lunch and dinner? I'm never going to have that fab figure again. Why be so damn responsible? Cause it's me and that's what I do, bummer

    ReplyDelete
  3. Yeah!! Will someone please arrest this intruder in my mirror? Who does she think she is anyway? Where did I GO?????

    >^,,^<

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hi, I love your musings. I just received this little list about growing old, I hope you enjoy it as much as I did:

    Reporter interviewing a 104-year-old woman:
    'And what do you think is the best thing about being 104?' the reporter asked.She simply replied, 'No peer pressure.'

    The nice thing about being senile is You can hide your own Easter eggs.

    I've sure gotten old! I've had two bypass surgeries, a hip replacement, new knees,fought prostate cancer and diabetes I'm half blind,
    Can't hear anything quieter than a jet engine,
    Take 40 different medications that make me dizzy, winded, and subject to blackouts. Have bouts with dementia. I have poor circulation;
    hardly feel my hands and feet anymore. Can't remember if I'm 89 or 98. Have lost all my friends. But, thank God, I still have my driver's license.

    I feel like my body has gotten totally out of shape, so I got my doctor's permission to join a fitness club and start exercising. I decided to take an aerobics class for seniors. I bent, twisted, gyrated, jumped up and down, and perspired for an hour. But, by the time I got my leotards on, The class was over.

    My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be.

    Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.

    It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffee maker.

    Peace ~ Out
    Teresa

    ReplyDelete